"Not to say that one should abstain from this kind of activity, but it's best to do it when the kids are not in your custody or [are] at a friend's house." Still thinking of having your new love spend the night when the kids are home?"A good rule of thumb is to do a 'morning after' gut check," Boykin says.If activities seem too hard on your schedule or psyche right now, Zane says to look into the Internet dating scene."They are fun, flirty, and super ego boosters," says Zane.And Baumgartner says that single parents need to consider that this may be true."I tell clients that having some time for 'just themselves' is important," she says.
Once you've decided that you're ready to date, it might feel impossible to find the time.No matter what the age of the child, avoid a detailed account of why you broke up.Your kids deserve an explanation, but shouldn't be your confidants."This is big nay for me when children are in the house," Zane says."How would you feel if your kids came into your bedroom in the middle of the night with this person sleeping over? If you can comfortably answer your child's questions and tend to their needs with that person lying in bed next to you, then maybe you're on the way to some slumber parties." If not, you can find other creative ways to make time for intimacy.
"I always remind my clients: You've already had your kids and white dress moment, so there should be no rush to the altar again." Don't focus on finding the one; concentrate on meeting new people, developing new friendships, and having fun.