Dating pre op transsexual university of kentucky dating tips
In particular, I've insistently avoided publicly disclosing my surgical status: Whether I am post-, pre-, or non-operative.In other words, whether my trans body includes its factory-original penis and rage-inducing gonads, or has been up-, down-, or side-graded with a vagina and assorted vulva surgically sculpted by the careful hands of our world's most ambitious plastic surgeons.
The unreliable M on my birth certificate is nothing but a mockery of the entire bureaucratic registry and its backward rules, because throughout the medical aspects of my transition, I have refused the government's ultimatum to provide the dignity-violating medical documentation it requires from me in order to legally acknowledge that I am who I say I am. I have chosen to live by the principle that I should be the one to decide with whom I share these intimate physical details of myself, not some bureaucrat, or even a doctor.
If I were to publicize being post-op, it might silently reinforce the stereotype that trans person wants surgery, or that a trans person is legitimized through surgery, or that a trans person is required to talk about or share details of their surgical experience.
If surgery was an absolute critical necessity as part of transition, in order to relieve terrible dysphoria, then that's my truth.
Most sites allow you to choose between only two genders, male and female.
Furthermore, there tends not to be much flexibility when it comes to stating your sexual orientation.
A little later on in my transition, once I began presenting as male, I set up profiles on two mainstream dating sites, one listing myself as male without stating that I was trans, and the other listing my trans status. A few months after posting my profiles to both sites, I received a message on the site where I hadn’t disclosed that I was trans.